6 Reasons To Work With A Men’s Therapist
“I don’t need therapy. I can find a way to figure it out on my own. What would I even talk about? I would just be wasting a therapist’s time anyway.” This is what I have heard from men before on why they don’t go to therapy. We already have plenty of stigma around mental health therapy that makes people hesitant to seek help, and men seem to be especially hesitant to go to therapy. I totally get it. I am a man too, and I recognize how men are taught not to need help, not to show emotions, and to keep it all together. I know from personal experience and being a therapist that this isn’t healthy. This causes inner turmoil, conflict in relationships, and a decline in men’s mental health.
Everyone needs therapy at some point in their life. It doesn’t matter how much you have it together. You can’t keep doing it alone. You shouldn't have to do it alone. As humans, we aren’t built to figure it out alone. We require support from time to time. There is no award for trying to figure it out by yourself. If you are looking for solutions to your problems, therapy is where it’s at.
Therapy for men can help
If you are a man and have a desire to improve your mental health, therapy for men can help you. If you are a man that wants to overcome past experiences, find relief from being held back by past mistakes, and want to improve your relationships, therapy for men is for you. I admire men that are willing to work on their mental health. It’s not easy to focus on improving your mental health, but it’s worth it. I think it’s important to recognize that I am sure you can find solutions and figure things out on your own, but that doesn’t mean you should. It also may not be that efficient to try and figure it out on your own. The men I work with are talented and good at many things, so they often think they should just tough it out with this too. I don’t want you to keep doing that, and you really don’t have to. Therapists are trained to help you work through your problems. Therapy has the power to change your life, and I don’t think you’ll regret it.
Reasons to work with a men’s therapist in Utah
There are plenty of reasons to work with a men’s therapist and to go to therapy. These are just a few that you may consider when deciding to go to therapy.
Dealing with stress at work
The men I work with decide to go to counseling because they have stressful lives. They have been successful and do well at their jobs, but it feels overwhelming. They struggle with being a perfectionist and care about doing a good job. Something has occurred in their life where they just don’t feel on top of everything anymore. They’re afraid of slipping up and losing what they’ve worked so hard to be successful at. When stressed, you might have a shorter fuse with the people you love in your life. Being irritable with your spouse or children is probably not how you want to show up for them. Counseling can help you work through your stressors so they don’t get pent up and cause you to lash out at the people you care about. I also understand that you want to do well at your job, and making sure you can handle the stress that’s on your shoulders is important to be able to do. Therapy can yield positive and unexpected results for you at your job. A men’s therapist can help you problem-solve the areas you may not have thought about. It also feels good to have a place where you can talk about the things stressing you out without worrying about offending anyone or being judged.
Help you manage fatherhood
Nobody tells you how to be a good dad or what to expect from fatherhood. I wish there were a guidebook for all this, but there isn’t. I know there’s often a lot of pressure to be the “breadwinner,” especially here in Utah, and to make enough money so your wife can stay home with the kids. I’m not saying this is your exact situation, but I know it’s common in this state. There’s a lot of societal pressure for men to sacrifice to maintain their self-worth. It can be exhausting to work all day and come home and start caring for kids when you have been working hard all day. I know you love your kids and probably wouldn’t trade them for anything. It’s also hard to maintain your own needs and well-being with trying to figure out how to be a good dad. Working with a men’s therapist can help you work through this and learn to cope without judging you or labeling you as weak. Therapy can help you try something different that maybe you haven’t thought about when it comes to parenting. As your therapist, I want to help and won’t think less of you for struggling.
Teach you skills to manage anxiety and depression
As I shared, men learn to believe that they can’t have emotions or are seen as weak. Many men struggle with anxiety and depression but hold it all inside because they can’t talk about it. Holding in those feelings can often manifest as anger, and this seems to be the only appropriate emotion for men to feel. All of that is completely false and unhelpful to men. Being a man doesn’t mean you don’t struggle with feeling anxious or down about yourself. Men struggle with their self-esteem just like women do. It’s ok that you feel down and depressed sometimes. It doesn’t mean you are weak or unworthy. You don’t deserve to feel that way and not have the assistance of someone that knows how to help you. A therapist can help you at least admit to yourself that you are struggling and not judge you for it. Therapy can help you learn the coping skills to manage and improve symptoms of anxiety and depression. You feel better and have relief from depression and anxiety.
Work through past experiences
What many men don’t realize is that past experiences impact their current functioning and future. Every man who has walked the earth has been through something painful that has impacted them. Most men don’t realize that the experiences they’ve been through are considered trauma. The men I work with often minimize what they have been through, and because they haven’t gone to war or been in the military, they don’t think about what they’ve had as trauma. It’s ok even if your experiences weren’t traumatic to you, but they still have shaped you as a person, and maybe you have memories that you try not to think about because they hurt or make you feel bad about yourself. Therapy can help you work through those past feelings and help you not be so weighed down by what happened. Therapy can help you change the negative beliefs you feel about yourself. You don’t have to avoid those places, things, or situations that bring up those past feelings. Trauma therapy can help you feel more empowered and like yourself again. Working with a men’s therapist that gets what you are going through makes a huge difference.
Improve your relationship with your significant other
While I am a couples therapist and often work with married couples or those in serious relationships wanting to improve their relationship with their partner, one thing that the men I work with in individual therapy might be surprised to know is that by itself can drastically improve your relationship. Working on yourself and learning to cope with life will inevitably impact your marriage or relationship. Therapy for men can help you work on your communication skills and learn to be vulnerable in a safe way. I view a therapy session as practice in some ways for your life outside of therapy. Practicing sharing your feelings with a therapist can translate into talking to your spouse, significant other, friends, and other family members about what you are going through. You'll be a better husband, father, and friend when you work through your past trauma and learn to cope with your anxiety and depression. Therapy can also be a place where you can talk about things that have been difficult for you in the past in your relationships and learn to work through some of the difficulties that strain your relationships.
Learn coping skills to manage life
Life is stressful, sad, and overwhelming sometimes. You can’t possibly know what lies ahead of you in your life or let alone how to cope with it. There are plenty of experiences that occur that make it difficult for us to be able to manage it without becoming overwhelmed, depressed or anxious. You are a human, and our brains aren’t equipped to deal with some of the things we go through without support. Working with a men’s therapist can help you learn how to deal with stressful things. You can learn how to cope in healthier ways than you are currently. You don’t have to have it all together all the time. Let’s be real; our families don’t always teach us the best way to cope with life. Changes are when you’ve been beaten down, exhausted, and stressed out, and people don’t know how to support you in coping with that. A therapist can be a coach and provide a scaffold for you to work on coping.
Therapy for men can improve your mental health
When it comes down to it, men’s mental health matters. It matters just as much as anyone else. You don’t have to keep sacrificing your needs or pretend you don’t have feelings just because our messed-up society says that’s the way to live. Just because you are men doesn’t mean you have to suffer in silence and be ignored and forgotten. You are not meant to be an unfeeling robot. Men have the ability to feel things deeply, and it’s ok to feel those things deeply. We need more men to be able to be in touch with their feelings, and it doesn’t mean you aren't going to go cry everywhere you go. It just means you are learning to acknowledge your emotions.
Start working with a men’s therapist in Utah
It’s ok to reach out for help. You don’t have to try to figure it all out yourself. This Northern Utah Counseling Practice has a men’s therapist specializing in therapy for men. To begin therapy, follow the steps below:
Meet with a men’s therapist in Utah
Begin counseling
Online Therapy in Utah
I know you have a busy schedule and might be hesitant to reach out for help because you don’t know how you’ll make it work. I can give you more time in your day, but I can offer you some convenience, which is why I offer online therapy in Utah. This is like a facetime call but on a secure video platform offering you privacy and convenience.
I enjoy being able to help men all throughout Utah. I work with men in Logan, Salt Lake City, Cedar City, Heber, St. George, and more. Reach out today.
Other mental health services provided by Marcus Hunt Therapy
Therapy for men isn’t the only mental health service provided at this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services Marcus Hunt Therapy provides include anxiety therapy, PTSD treatment, depression therapy, EMDR therapy, LDS marriage counseling, marriage counseling, and premarital counseling in Utah.
About the Author
Marcus Hunt is an associate marriage and family therapist at Marcus Hunt Therapy in Utah. He has a degree from Utah Valley University in behavioral sciences. Marcus also has a master's degree in marriage and family therapy. He enjoys focusing on men’s issues in therapy and to reduce the stigma around men not being allowed to show emotions. Marcus believes as a men’s therapist who has experienced similar issues as the men he works with that; he can help them work through the shared experience. When Marcus isn’t in his therapist role, he is likely playing fetch with his Goldendoodle somewhere in Spanish Fork, Utah.