Premarital Counseling in Utah
You are hesitant to take the next step toward marriage. Perhaps you haven’t always had the best examples of a healthy relationship with those around you. You listened to your parents bicker and argue, and that’s not what you want. If you’re a child of divorced parents, going into a marriage yourself seems terrifying. These experiences were devastating to you and changed your life. You don’t want to go through this again with your future spouse. You’ll do anything to avoid being in that situation. Growing up in an unhealthy family dynamic makes it even more difficult to want to get married.
Maybe you have had positive examples of happy marriages and came from a healthy family, but you have been in bad relationships before and don’t want to repeat them. If you’re going to commit to a marriage, you need assurance this relationship won’t be like the last one. You don’t want to feel that pit in your stomach and anxiety when you think about this person you love hurting you like you’ve been hurt before. What’s the point of getting married if it results in more heartache?
Your experiences matter and they impact your relationship. It’s hard to push those experiences and fears aside when making one of your life's biggest decisions. You just want to make sure you are ready and making the right decision for you. Premarital counseling might be your answer.
Common Reasons Couples Begin Premarital Counseling
Everyone has unique reasons for seeking premarital counseling. These are some common examples of why people begin premarital counseling
Learn effective communication skills: knowing how to talk to each other is essential to a healthy marriage.
Build trust with your partner: addressing issues that may contribute to hesitancy or mistrust in moving forward with marriage.
Plan for the future: deciding on having children and how to raise them
Address current issues: Working through issues before going into marriage can start your marriage off in a good direction
Learn new things about one another: therapy helps you gain more understanding and awareness about yourself and each other.
Set expectations for marriage: discussing all your hopes, dreams, goals, and expectations with your partner guided by a couples therapist can be invaluable for a relationship
Why is premarital counseling so important?
You might be wondering if going to premarital counseling is really that important. Is it really going to make that big of a difference in your future marriage? I don’t know you or your significant other and yet I can still confidently say absolutely yes. Premarital counseling is one of my favorite counseling services to offer because it gives couples the tools they need to be successful together before potential issues even arise in the marriage. Premarital counseling will help you know how to talk to each other effectively without a heated argument or slamming doors. This therapy can help you have a better relationship than you’ve ever had before. If you are terrified of divorce or are freaked out about having a marriage like your parents, you’re going to find premarital counseling to be a game-changer.
Help build a healthy marriage from the start
Premarital counseling can help you create a marriage that is built on a healthy foundation from the start. Just like a house has to have a solid foundation before anything else can be built on top, the same with marriage. As a marriage therapist, I help couples learn healthy ways of talking to each other without shutting down or feeling misunderstood. Having the right skills can prevent so much heartache and tears. It’s not to say there won’t be conflicts or hard times because every relationship does. However, premarital counseling can help you know how to navigate conflicts much better. Learning how to talk about your feelings might be a new thing for you, and it may be hard to know what to do when you didn’t grow up in a family that talked about your feelings. Shaking it off or pretending conflict didn’t happen won’t help your marriage stay strong and connected. Premarital counseling can help you know how to talk about your feelings so that both you and your partner feel safe and heard.
Every couple goes into a marriage with certain expectations, some are unspoken and sometimes they don’t match what your partner’s expectations are. Through working in premarital counseling you can talk about your expectations for family, money, sex, etc with a marriage therapist that knows how to make those hard conversations go much more smoothly. Premarital counseling is all about finding out what your goals are as a couple and in your marriage and finding ways to make them happen.
Have a successful second marriage
If you’ve been married before or have come from past relationships that went south, you might be feeling shaky and nervous going into a second marriage. You might not feel confident in yourself or your ability to make a marriage last. Maybe you are planning on marrying someone that’s been divorced, and you’re feeling uncertain about how this marriage is going to be different than their last. Premarital counseling is able having a place to talk about what worked and what didn’t work in your last marriage and how to make sure it doesn’t happen again. You have no doubt learned a lot of lessons from your last marriage, and working with a marriage therapist can help you implement the good into your new marriage. It’s possible that you are scared to open up and fully trust again because of the past pain from your last relationship. You know you don’t want it to affect your new relationship but you don’t know how to get past it. As a couples therapist, I know how to help you have this conversation with your partner and how to help you dig a little deeper to find out how to help you be your best self. You are capable of having a healthy and happy second marriage regardless of what happened in your last one, and I know premarital counseling can help.
Help couples blend their families
Blending your families together can be such a delicate process. Whether it’s you or your partner or both that have kids to blend together into your new marriage, it can feel like a lot. Not knowing how your family will work together can cause a lot of anxiety. Successfully blending families starts with the couple. In premarital counseling, together we can talk about the anticipated concerns or issues that may arise through combining your families together. As a marriage and family therapist, I can give you tools and skills to help you with this process. I also can help you have realistic expectations of what blending can look like. Each member of the family has unique qualities and strengths, and as a couple, you can focus on those to make blending a family successful. Premarital counseling can help you both talk about your hopes and dreams as well as your needs for blending your families together.
Premarital Counseling in Utah can help you start your marriage off on the right foot
Many couples feel the way you do, and I have seen them able to work through their fears, develop healthy ways of communicating with each other, and decide whether to be married or not with confidence. You can have hope that you can not feel held back by your past experiences or your relationships. Premarital counseling can help the future of your relationship.
I understand as a couple you want to be able to work through current issues and build trust in your partner. I have helped couples overcome these obstacles and will be able to help you achieve your goals as well through premarital counseling.
Marcus Hunt Therapy’s approach to Premarital Counseling
My goal for you is to be able to help you create the type of relationship you want to have. I want to help you heal from your past experiences and be able to talk about your feelings and needs with your partner. I believe premarital counseling can drastically change the course of your marriage by talking about issues before they even happen. I’m not here to judge you or tell you whether or not you should get married or not but I am here to help you have hard conversations. My job is to help you move forward from your experiences, and help you feel prepared for marriage.
What’s holding you back from starting working with a premarital counselor in Utah?
It’s easy to feel like premarital counseling isn’t necessary, and you might believe if it was the right relationship you would be dealing with the fears and doubts that you are. That thought and belief aren’t always accurate, and there are many reasons to start premarital counseling. You have the ability to create the type of relationship you want and this requires work, effort, and having hard conversations.
One barrier couples have to start premarital is having time in their busy schedules. I offer online therapy in Utah as a way of helping couples have greater convenience in being able to get the help that they need. Online therapy is as effective as in-person therapy. Online therapy is much like a facetime call where you meet face-to-face with a relationship expert.
Start working on your relationship with Premarital Counseling in Utah
You don’t have to feel stuck with relationship uncertainty and fear of moving forward with marriage. Premarital counseling can help you feel prepared and ready for marriage. This Utah Counseling clinic has a marriage therapist in Utah that can help. To start premarital therapy follow these steps:
Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation with Marcus Hunt
Complete online forms and schedule the first session with a couples therapist
Begin premarital counseling!
Other Mental Health Services Provided by Marcus Hunt Therapy
Premarital counseling isn’t the online counseling service I provide at this Utah Counseling Clinic. Other mental health services at Marcus Hunt Therapy include anxiety treatment, PTSD treatment, couples and marriage counseling, marriage counseling for LDS couples, therapy for men, and EMDR and trauma therapy.
What are the goals of premarital counseling?
As a marriage counselor, my goal for couples coming into premarital counseling is to help them gain the skills that help them have a happy and healthy marriage. I want to help you talk about the hard things. The topics you are the most hesitant and nervous to bring up might be some of the most important ones for you to have the best marriage possible. Premarital counseling will give you communication skills, set realistic expectations, and help you deal with conflict when it arises. Most of all premarital counseling will help you learn so much about yourself and how to make changes to have a good marriage.
What are the pros and cons of premarital counseling?
Premarital counseling has many pros for you to consider. Premarital counseling will help you improve your communication, be more understanding of your partner, learn to deal with conflicts before they even happen, and grow closer as a couple. You will have a much better marriage if you go to premarital counseling first. Working with a couples therapist will help you start the whole marriage off on a better note than if you didn’t go to therapy at all.
Some cons of premarital counseling are it’s an investment of time and money. It’s tempting to skip out on investing in premarital counseling when you’re busy and have a wedding you are trying to save money for. Therapy may also be uncomfortable sometimes in what we need to talk about to help you have a good marriage. Overall, I believe the pros drastically outweigh the cons and it’s as a huge return on investment on your marriage for years to come.
What do you talk about in premarital counseling?
Honestly, we can talk about whatever you want and need to talk about in premarital counseling. I can also understand that you may want ideas of important areas to address in these sessions. Here are some common topics that come up in premarital counseling:
1. Communication skills
As a marriage counselor, I’m here to help you learn to be a good listener to your partner through learning to validate, listen reflectively, and help them feel understood. Premarital counseling helps you learn to talk about difficult topics through the right ways of communicating.
2. Sexual Intimacy
Talking about sex can be awkward and uncomfortable, especially with a stranger. As a couples therapist, I know how to make these important conversations less weird because I know how important it is to talk about hopes, expectations, and fears when it comes to sex in order to be successful in marriage.
3. Expectations and roles
You may have a vision of what you think marriage is going to be like but your partner might have different expectations and ideas. Premarital counseling helps you share what these are and to speak openly about roles in a marriage.
4. Finances
We all have different attitudes and experiences with money. They are likely going to be different than your partner’s. Talking about how you are going to handle finances and money is important to address in the beginning and with a couples therapist.
5. Family relationships
A common point of stress and tension in marriages is dealing with in-laws and family relationships. Being able to talk about how much time you are going to spend with family, navigating holidays, etc are important things to talk about in premarital counseling.
What is the success rate of premarital counseling?
Studies have shown that couples who attend and participate in premarital counseling have higher levels of relationship satisfaction, better communication, and reduced divorce rates compared to couples who do not participate and attend premarital counseling. The skills and insights gained in premarital counseling can help couples deal with challenges, resolve conflicts, and build a strong foundation for their marriage. The success of premarital counseling is really dependent on how hard you want to work in these therapy sessions and the work you do during the week outside of sessions.
What are the benefits of premarital counseling?
The benefits and advantages of premarital counseling are dependent on the couples but here are some of the common benefits of attending and participating in premarital counseling.
Improved communication skills
Greater conflict resolution skills
Safe space to address difficult topics
Reduced divorce rates
Greater emotional intimacy
Better problem-solving skills
Shares goals and values
Improved ability to navigate family relationships
Higher marital satisfaction
How long is premarital counseling?
Premarital counseling is usually between 8-12 weeks of weekly therapy sessions. It is often longer when couples are diving deep into their past and working to overcome potential relationship obstacles together. In order to get good results, committing to weekly therapy sessions for around three months is best.
Begin premarital counseling in Utah today
You can have the best chance of having a successful marriage by working with a premarital counselor in Utah. You can learn how to talk to each other and grow closer as a couple. Schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation to start premarital counseling.